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Vintage Outlandish!

This Content From 2003 (or earlier) see index

[outlandish] | [my story] | [love] | [sin] | [places] | [philosophy]

Ecstasy (MDMA)

"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet"

-- Kafka

"Best... Drug... Ever!"

-- Mark

The "love" drug

Ecstasy has to be one of the best times you can have as a person. As far as chemical ways to tinker with experience, it's hard to beat. Just plain fun with very little badness as long as you're careful, stay hidrated and don't become a fiend. E lets me tap into all that dangerous sex energy I've got, but it takes the cock right out of it. It makes things safe on a personal level.

While MDMA doesn't really lead to the god-vision type revelations of acid or mushrooms, it can be really good for breaking out of your shell, for coming together with others, or for just having plain old all American fun. They call it ecstasy for a reason, people. It's a good freeking time.

That being said, I've recently learned that just because you've got this little molecule running amok in your head doesn't mean everything will be fun. If you're tired and cranky, even the kindest MDMA is a poor substitute for a juice box and a good long nap. If you don't feel like doing it, just don't do it.

Some quick tips from my limited but very positive experience:

  • Lesson #1: Make sure you're getting good esctasy, but don't obsess about "purity" and that sort of thing. Both will ruin the experience. Do your homework, then forget about it.
  • Lesson #2: Don't do it very often. Once a month is definitely pushing it according to what I've seen. 2 or 3 times a year is good if you really like it. Once a year makes it something truely special.
  • Lesson #3: Be with friends in a good place where you can do the things you love. This will unlock the depths of fun and personal growth that can happen.

This is a great experience to undertake with a mix of people you know and people you don't. It's also a lot of fun to use your body (running, jumping, dancing, yoga... again: stay hydrated) and a lot of fun to hug and kiss people. It lets you rise abovy and beyond your subconsciously manipulative social ways and tell people the truth, be it with words or with other ways of using your mouth.

Ecstasy caveat: this drug has been known to produce really wicked hangovers. Not only will it dehydrate you like a mutha, leaving you with a feeling like you drank too much, but you can also burn through a lot of neurotransmitters while you're having your good time. I for one have found the morning after to be a pleasent opportunity to rest and reflect, but it helps to know that the low is coming and that the low is OK too.

As with any other drug, the real lasting value is in how much of the experience you can carry with you and what that does for you in straight life. Ideally, humans should be a lot more capable of touching each other as an expression of caring. But because we're uptight, and becasue there are bad people out there, we don't get to do this. Maybe if you roll around on E, you'll get better at letting this kind of thing happen. I really hope so, for everyone's sake.

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Trips

Trips in Space and Time 8/02/03

Big Wheels in Berkeley
I scored a set of west-coast wheels today at the Ashby BART station flea market. It's a very tall schwinn road bike, black, deceptively heavy but smooth-riding. Thirty-five dollars to boot. I oiled and cleaned the works, dialed in the bakes and took it out for a shake-down cruise immediately. Nice riding on a beautiful saturday, realizing how out of shape I am as I wheezed my way though the hilly area behind the Berkeley campus.

After about an hour I started to get the swing of it. Made some minor mechanical adjustments (including a free wheel truing at the bike collective on Shattuck), drank a few liters of water and started finding my groove, cruising up and around and ending up with a beautiful view of the whole bay. The roads here are not kind to the speed inclined -- too many stop signs and crosswalks and lights -- but it was good to get out and proj for a while. This changes my summer dramatically.

...older trips...

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