At least John Kerry is a better snowboarder than I am. I tend to get the feeling with him -- as I do with a lot of prominant people -- that I could do better; however, after my recent experience, I have to give it up for his ability to carve. Lookin' sharp, brah.

It's a weird time. I'm a little hung over from last night. Only a little; 4 or 5 pints of Guiness, and no tangy biking vegan from Seattle to stumble into either. That's too bad, I guess. I'm still lacking my mojo, or at least the energy and fortitude to whip it out and apply. I was thinking the other day about my faux-sex-symbol status at work (thanks Spacewaitress), and how/if/should I ever make that work for me. On a certain level I love attention like anyone does, yet at the same time I don't want to have to live up to any expectation or go out of my way to get my kudos.

Need to stretch more.

The Republicans are pissed about third-party groups influencing this election, and it ain't about moveon. Here's the opening volly from the Media Fund (aka George Soros). It's ok, but it's like Bush's ads, but without the punch. The shipping jobs overseas thing is the hardest hit, but it's not really driven home. Kerry's ads are harder hitting and better edited. Using Bush to beat Bush is a pretty good tactic as long as you're not taking something wildly out of context.

Update: the Log Cabin Republicans are speding a mil to air ads against Bush's hate amendment. It would seem that the right-wing consensus is unraveling, and not a minute too soon.

I'm fairly old-school on the daily kos, but I haven't been posting much since Dean went down in flames. I still read it though; Markos has an eye for news, and you get hot links to things which Paul Krugman picks up later on in the week. It's good and comforting to see old names, names I have come to trust, putting out rather high quality text. There are a lot of new faces, some of them interesting, some not. And the air is a bit different.

I don't write about things very much anymore... this will probably change some when I get into the work of crafting some vision stuff, but at the moment I'm still recovering from my Howard Dean hangover. I'm happier plugging databases and writing code than wrestling with the situation in prose at the moment. It's partly, I know, because there was a time when I was really convinced that my writing was making a difference -- which it was and is in whatever way it always has and will -- but much grandeur and possibility has subsided. Not that I'm discouraged; just smarting.

And writing is art for me. It's not something I can really force, or something I really feel comfortable wielding in a precise manner. I prefer to let fly with exuberance and passion, so this little era of low-energy and message control is doubly inhibiting.

On a different note, I've become quite a fan over the past three months of Stirling Newberry, who also writes on BOPnews and other places too. I once heckled him under an assumed name on the Clark Sphere back in a snarky partisan summer moment. Now I know better. Pay attention; he's got a line on the Naked Lunch of it all.

Since I heard in the laundymat before going to my poll that Edwards was gonna drop out -- yet another miscarriage of democracy, but who's counting? -- I voted for good ol' Howard, rogue though he was. It's the end of a chapter, the beginning of something new; I'm filing this under general because while it's about politics, it's more about me. About time we had a good old self-centered blog anyway.

One of the things that strikes me now is just how weird this whole thing has been, how weird the political scene is. My roommate Molly, anarchist sailor that she is, opined to me the other night that people who seek to speak for others are not generally the best lot in society. I couldn't help but agree, but contended that it more had to do with the culture which surrounds politics, and not with the nature of politics or humanity itself.

I believe this, but not alltogether steadfastly. The stresses of power attract (and create) strange personalities. I can see it in my own life: moments of irrational aggression, mood swings, fatigue, dreams of impotence and premature ejaculation. Is it any surprise that a great many people -- good, decent, intelligent people -- would rather not be bothered to lend a hand at running the world? And why not? Tenuous as I think they might be, things are still pretty decent here in America. PATRIOT shmatriot; other than frisking in an airport line, most of us don't really feel any less Free. Why involve yourself in all that ugly business if you don't have to? Why take on the responsibility?

I don't believe that people are stupid. I don't even believe that they're necessarily lazy; but it does seem that the human animal likes to avoid responsibility. Hell, I'd like to avoid some responsibility, have some goofy rollicking trucker-hat fun or something. This shit is a real drag a lot of the time, even though I believe taking it on is an essential part of finding purpose.

So where does this leave me; overworked and undersexed, all-in for the next six months to try and make some change happen here in these United States? I don't really know. I'm honestly quite dispirited, looking forward to a long season carrying water for John Kerry. I hope to creating an agenda of my own -- our own -- that I can chamption. Kerry will hopefully be a footnote to my campaign. Perhaps (who knows?) he might rise to the occasion and show himself to be a great and inspiring human being. I'm not counting on anything so grand, but I do think he can beat Bush. But what then? Then it would seem the real work begins.

The real work. Ye gods. The pitch of this task must shift, or else my role evolve. I need allies; people to consort with. I need my people -- somthing I've never really had, shiftless gap-walking ranger that I am. I do little to invite or accomodate, yet I need people to come share the load. Not just to volunteer their time, but to open themselves to the enormity of Everything and help me find the light in all of it. There is lightness in there; progress and humor and love -- I'm sure of it -- but the darkness and void predominates, and as a lonesome actor it is dauntingly much to confront.

This is the low after the high, the day after Disneyland, but given what this particular Magic Kingdom contained it was somewhat less fun. It'll get better. But what it will be I cannot say. Let's put some makeup on this pig. But first get me a pound of peanut m&m's; I need to hibernate.

I'm over at Hastings for a conference. I wrote up the first panel for my MfA blog.

My panel was good. I don't think I was imagining it that the audience was fullest for us, being that we had the massive star power. I was sitting between Krist Novoselic (bassist for Nirvana) and Fat Mike of NOFX, with Jenny Toomey (Director of the awesome Future of Music Coalition) sitting in and moderating. Nervous! I think I did ok though. People had positive feedback for me, and I'm hoping to get some constructive criticism tomorrow. It was kind of a rush.

Lawrence Lessig is a-fucking-mazing. I've been a fan of his work for a while, but I'd never seen/heard him live. His presentaion was one step shy of genius theater of the mind. His pacing; his use of visuals and music; his messge which is down-to-earth and intellectually as close to bullet proof as it gets... I want to put this man on tour all over the nation to promote Free Cultre, or at least rip off his act and get enough people excited that we can stick The Man Himself on the Supreme Court. I'll try to find video of that if I can.

In all it was an interesting day. I was surprised at how many misconceptions were floating around. The notion that filesharing cut into music industry profits was gospel, when in fact it's highly debatable. The technology community was also somewhat underrepresented. Nowhere was this more apparent than in the keynote of State Senator Kevin Murray. I was called away from his work in-progress to prep for my panel, which was a good thing because half way through it I was almost in full rant mode. I took notes during his speech and I will send his office a message with some far more laid-back responses than I would have given in-person. I don't know if any attention will be paid, but I'd like to educate the man.

Anyway, it was a great experience. There were a lot of smart, good-looking, energetic people there. I got to tag-team-transcribe one panel via SubEthaEdit and Rendzevious (my new favorite way to know who's definitely "in the know" about tech at these things). I got to shmooze a little later. It was fun to talk in front of folks. If I can keep this up without getting hooked on Hubris (good luck, comanche) I might get to make it a more regular thing.

Trippi's new org is taking shape. According to this there will be a localized meeting in SF, which I will probably attend. See you there?

I'm in the office. It's 2am. I'm stuffing envelopes, working on a dvd, and setting up some mailing lists. I'm fairly confidant that in four or eight years this will be more commonplace experience. As it is I feel a little like a pioneer.

While I'm in the business of promoting friends' sites out there, here's one that might turn real interesting real soon: changeforamerica.com. I don't know what the plan is organizationally, but I think it would be cool if a whole plethora of "foramerica" sites and organizations started popping up.

I got to see Joe up close at the Digital Democracy Teach-In, which I want to write about. I have too little focus at the moment to create quality content, so I'll spare you my pithy ramblings. The short and sweet is that the tech community has a ways to come yet politically, and that the political community has a ways to come yet technically, but the two are moving closer together. This is good. While I get frustrated from time to time I also think what's going on is really exciting, and it's only the beginning too.

I believe that the intersection of network technologies and politics will be part of the Next Big Thing for humanity, because it presents us with a the first radically different way to organize ourselves since the invention of metropolises and mass media made facist nationalism possible. It could still go all wrong -- which would really be a 1984 situation -- but I think the odds are that enough people involved in decision making and tool building are non-evil to prevent dystopia. My only worry is that it won't go right quickly enough.

radio.deanforamerica.com

My man Zack is producing this, and my man and woman Nicco and Zephyr are hosting it. I'm listening to their second show right now and it's good. Weekdays at 9pm and Weekends at 4pm; eastern time. This is exciting. I don't know if it will help the campaign come around, but it's fun to listen. The real cool thing is that just about anyone can get in on this act at some point.

Keep on pushing, guys. The media paradigm is going to roll whether it likes it or not.

According to CNN's exit poll, Dean beat Kerry in only a couple Demographic categories:

• 18-29 year olds
• The Very Liberal
• Minority Women
• People who use the internet often

That's my group! I think a coalition of young people, progressives, and minority women with a net-savvy edge would govern this country pretty well, and present a pretty good alternative to Bush.

But I want serious progress, so take it with a grain of salt; call it spin if you must, but that picture of John Kerry giving the thumbs up in front of a crowd of dour-faced old white men gave me the creeps. I want youth, I want women, I want color, and I want technology. And I want it now! ;)

So now we find out if Dean's really low on cash, and see what he can do with his speech tonight. It's not over yet, but we're up against the acid test. We'll see what we can do at seven places at once in a week.

And I can't fucking believe I just used a smiley-face in a blog. Time for whiskey.